We All Fall Down
by livesonacloudinthesky
Summary: Sirius didn't know what was happening until hours later. You would think that you would feel when it when you lose the biggest part, the best part of you. Well, he didn't.


_Hi!_  
_Sorry for not writing something in such a long time. I always tried but nothing ever got finished. So last night around 11 pm I suddenly felt inspired and wrote and wrote until I finished this around 3:30 in the morning. I knew I would never get this finished if I would go to sleep before finishing._

_Anyways, I hope enjoy this little thing. Also the name of the fic is inspried by 'All Fall Down' by One Republic__. (since I am really bad with coming up with name I rather use songs)_

_So please leave a review. _

* * *

**We All Fall Down.**

_Know that we all fall down_  
_Love till you hate_  
_Strong till you break_  
_Know that we all fall down_

Sirius didn't know what was happening until hours later. You would think that you would feel when it when you lose the biggest part, the best part of you. Well, he didn't.

They shouldn't have separated, it was a stupid idea, just like she had said, but of course he wouldn't listen, Sirius never listened to her. The glorious Sirius Black, always right, always the hero. No, this time he was neither glorious, right nor the hero, he was just the boy, the boy who had fought too many battles for his age, the one that got broken at only 20.

He wanted to chase the death eaters into the tunnel and trap them, but his plan went wrong.

Marlene never arrived at the trap, and the death eaters got away. He was mad, furious even. How did she dare not to follow his plan? Because of her, three high ranked death eaters, might even ones from _his_ inner circle, escaped.

Frustrated and angry he had disappartated into the Aurors office to report her disobedience, but instead he found out that she did not report back yet, that no one has seen a sign of her.

Sounds just like her, he had thought, disappearing without telling a single soul.

Marlene always has been the odd one, never fitting in. In Hogwarts she had been a loner, always sitting by herself, in class always starring out the windows, day dreaming, although she always seemed to know the answer if she was asked something. She only ever talked if she got asked something.

Always a bright red bow in her blonde, braided hair. Many students had teased and bullied her because of it, stealing her ribbon, only to find them in the hospital wig with a black eye afterwards.

Marlene was odd, but tough. This is what Sirius had admired about her from the start.

When they got assigned as partners he was glad, selfish as he was, he knew that she would let him shine. Let him be the Hero, while she was the quiet brain of them.

But in those lonely nights on patrol, without any company, they got closer, became friends. She told him that the red bow, that he always found so odd, had been a present from her dead father; her father had given it to her on the morning of her first train ride to Hogwarts.

Only a day later her father died by the hands of Lord Voldemord himself.

To this day she wore that stupid, no not stupid he had to admit, her liked her red bow, it made Marlene, Marlene.

Sirius liked it when she talked about herself, which rarely happened; to his surprise he found it soothing to hear her voice.

On many days, when they had to use one of the enchanted tents of the ministry, he woke up to it being empty.

He never had given much thought of where she had gone. Probably visiting her boyfriend or family, or might as well reporting new information's they had gathered to the Aurors.

She always came back a few hours later, she never told him where she went and he never asked. They simply carried on with their mission.

Sirius felt comfortable in her companion, and she seemed to enjoy his too. Slowly he could see her opening up to him more and more. Smiling at his bad jokes, starting a conversation herself and sometimes he would even catch her singing a little tune to herself.

In battle he knew that as long they would fight together nothing could harm them. They worked as perfect unit. They got each others backs. Only when Sirius suggested that they should separate, he found Marlene doubting him, sometimes even disobeying him.

In the end, she had been right and her plan was the better idea. It ticked him off. He hated it when she made him look like a fool. She was supposed to be quiet and let him be the leader.

But he had to admit, when she had refused to take his order he found it hot. He liked it that someone had the nerves to stand up to him. After the second time she followed her own plan instead of his, she had vanished and didn't return to the tent until late that night.

Sirius had been sitting at the table with a glass full of firewhiskey, a nearly empty bottle and a full ash tray beside him when she had come back.

"Stop it." A quiet, shy voice came from behind him.

"Oi, McKinnon, nice of you to return after all. A really fucking, amazing idea of yours, to just bloody leave me alone in the warehouse, leaving me to explain the mess you created."

He knew it wasn't her fault, her plan was good, his was the one that messed up the mission, but leaving him alone to explain it to the others?

He took another sip of his liquid.

"I said stop it Sirius. You are working; you are not allowed to drink."

A dry laugh escaped him, than he slammed his glass on the desk and stormed towards her.

He could see the fear in her eyes, good he thought, let her be afraid; it might teach her a lesson.

He stopped only inches in front of her, almost touching her. Being a head smaller then him she had to look up to see his eyes. He smelled like alcohol, cigarettes and woods, she noticed. Marlene flinched when he reached behind her and pulled her ribbon roughly out of her hair.

"If you want to be taken serious lose this. You are not a little child; you are grown woman, for god sake, a damn fighter. No one will ever listen to anything you say as long you wear this."

He noticed that a tear slipped over her cheek but he didn't care.

"McKinnon, if you really want to do this job. Learn how to fucking stand up for yourself. You might fight well but it takes courage to stand your point. If you don't like my bloody plan, tell me, so we can work over it, other wise I can't trust you any longer. I need you to do your job so we both can make it out alive."

His voice softened at the last part, and she nodded. Her hurt eyes starred on the floor. He sighed defeated and placed her red bow in her hand. She jumped up in surprise of his touch, which made him chuckle.

"Thank you" she muttered as she closed her hand in a fist to hold on to the ribbon.

Sirius eyes followed her actions; she looked so fragile and lost in this moment. It also made him ache to see her smiling again. The small, but genuine smile, he learned to appreciate in this dull time.

So he kissed her, his lips only lingered on hers for only a few seconds but it changed everything. He had only wanted to see her smile; it had been the only thing he had come up with so fast.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. My mind was acting on it own."

He was pretty sure that it was the best thing he could come up with to apologize. When he finally met her bright blue eyes he found them in awe and desire.

A wave of lust hit him so he crashed his lips back on hers, closing the space between them, resting his hand on the small of her back. With her hands all over him he slowly led them to his bed, never breaking the contact. He moved his lips to her neck, trailing kisses down her neck to the front her throat. Gasping sounds escaped her at his soft, gentle touch, her hands intertwined in his hair.

Carefully he pushed her down onto the bed, pulling first her, then his own shirt. His lips moved over her belly bottom up to her chest, his eyes fixed with hers, the blue eyes so filled with desire for him.

That had been the moment he realized that she was beginning to become something more then just a friend.

The next morning he had woken up just to find that she was gone again. Hours later she returned, she moved silently across the room and gave him a simple kiss on the lips, than she began to busy herself in the kitchen.

Their relationship had been an up and down from there. They never spoke about what they were, nor did their work relation improve. Only that she stopped wearing her red bow, during work, she just put her hair in a simple, boring ponytail.

The morning Marlene went missing he had approached about her moving into his flat after they had finished their mission. She had panicked and started yelling that she barely even knew him and that he knew even less of her.

"I could just get to know you then, if you would just let me."

She had left once again and only showed up in time to a brief revelation of his plan of the death eater trap. He wanted her to cut the death eater off at the other site of the tunnel, so that they would meet in the middle where he had already set up a bunch of spells to trap them.

She had disagreed with him, that they should find another way, that it would be too dangerous how he planned it, but the first two death eater were already approaching so she had no other choice but follow his plan.

After Sirius left the ministry of magic he settled back into the tent, waiting for Marlene to arrive. In his head he already made up this wonderful speech he would say to her, but she never came.

In the first light of the day he stopped trying to fall asleep. The worry got him after all. Out of his back he pulled his two-way mirror to call his best friend to see if he knew anything new.

"Prongs, Oi, prongs Wake up!"

His best friend James Potter appeared on the other side of the mirror only seconds later, looking still half asleep.

"You okay, Padfoot?"

He nodded, than hesitated, he never told anyone about his relationship with Marlene. James only knew her as the odd blonde from Hogwarts. But now was not the moment to worry what his friend would think about her.

"Have you heard anything new about McKinnon? She isn't here yet. She usually shows up a couple of hours later. I'm worried."

His best friends face changed and suddenly Sirius knew that something was wrong.

"No one has told you?"

No, no one had contacted him. Sirius shook his head.

"What did no one told me? Is she alright? Please let her be alright."

James sighed and told him to wait a minute that he would come over and tell him personally.

That's when Sirius knew that it was serious, Marlene was not ok, that she was hurt or worse, no, he couldn't even think about the possibility.

A few seconds later Sirius heard a faint _Pop_ outside and James entered the enchanted tent.

"What, what happened to her James?"

His friend sat down beside him on the bed and put one hand on his shoulder.

"I didn't know you became so close, fuck, this makes it even harder."

James took a deep breath and told Sirius what happened. How the Aurors had found Marlene's dead body in front the entry of the tunnel, that most likely another death eater was there, hiding behind trees, making sure no one would enter it. He had killed her before she even realized that someone was watching her.

"It was a quick death, the death eater used the curse, and she felt no pain."

Sirius felt numb, the blonde odd girl with that stupid, ridicules red bow was gone, forever.

He would never get the chance to tell her that he loved her. That she made him a better person. That he loved it when her hair was completely open and the wind was pulling it from one, to the other side.

His hand touching the silk sheet underneath him, aware that this was the bed they spent their first night together in, where he fell in love with her.

James had helped him to pack Marlene's things and his own and took Sirius with him to Godrics Hallow.

The Ministry had asked him, a few days later, if he wanted to say a few words at her funeral, but he denied. What Marlene had said that morning, it was right, he didn't know much of her.

But what he knew was enough of her, to make him love her. The only request he made was, to have Marlene's hair be braid again, with her red bow ribbon in her hair, that he father gave her on her first day she entered Hogwarts, the place where she met him, for the first time.

_If ever your world starts crashing down_  
_Whenever your world starts crashing down_  
_If ever your world starts crashing down_  
_That's when you'll find me_

* * *

_Oh someone else still in Post-Depression mood? I know I am. When I think about it I still can't believe it really ended. Pottermore is also not really helping. Maybe if it will ever come to PoA that I get some more interesting. (Seriously, I need to find out more about Marauders, Lily and Marlene. I need Marlius to be Cannon)_

_Always,_  
_Lena_


End file.
